Pardon My Ignorance

Hello everyone! I'm that 'Snyder person' you see around every now and then. I have much to say, more than any of you will want to read, so I’ll try and keep this as short as possible (which isn’t saying much to the queen of writing too much). First I would like to thank Jazzy for inviting me to blog on here. I’ve scrolled through Team 13 Projects’ blog many times. I’ve always been intrigued and even envied those that are able to freely blog about anything that had to do with Vincent D’Onofrio and, more so, someone actually care enough to read what the person had to say.

So here’s my, lets say, introductory story. For most, this story will be new. For a few that know me, it’ll be a brief recap.

I haven’t been a Vincent D’Onofrio fan long. I think I’m the oddball out as far as being a fan of the “actor’s actor” for more years than I can count on my fingers; I believe that's a decade. In fact, I’ll be the first to admit that during my Law and Order: Special Victims Unit phase I went through, I was one of the first to call him, well, not so normal. I would post on the SVU forum daily; some of those fans happened to also be LOCI fans. Go figure, right? When someone would bring up LOCI, I would respond to them by rolling my eyes as I safely hid behind my computer prĂȘt near anonymous. I continued to question myself and wondered what the hell people could possibly see in him. I didn’t take the time to decipher whether it was the Criminal Intent character himself that was atypical or if it was the actor that drove me into a fit of annoyance. Besides, I didn’t know anything about this actor. The way he lurked about, his demeanor, quirkiness, and the way he did, as I found out later to be his signature traits such as bending over at the waist or tilting his head to one side; none of which I understood. It made me anxious in a way I cannot describe. But even more than those gestures that I did not quite get, I remember the one thing that had me absolutely annoyed and even provoked my misunderstanding mind even further to hate the show. It was a time when I briefly attempted to watch an episode. I think I actually raised my hands up in the air completely confused by this point. The fact that this guy would pause, for no apparent reason mind you, in the middle of a sentence had me completely baffled. It was like he was in front of his classmates in the 7th grade and came down with a case of stage fright. He kept forgetting what he intended to say. But then I pondered the fact that maybe he was one that just forgot his lines. Or maybe this giant of a man was actually shy in public or had a speech impairment? Or was it that he was just one of those people that had trouble expressing the right words even though he knew the exact words he wanted to say at the precise moment and only wished he could. Are you still with me? In other words, I really didn’t know crap about this character or Vincent D’Onofrio and I found myself wondering if he was just playing a role or if this is how the large man actually spoke. By this point I was completely lost and maybe even defeated. Where I found his speech to be odd, fans seemed to love. What was I missing?

Are you guys still reading after my harsh words? Now here’s where I got hooked:

No, not his crotch...although it didn't hurt. But the case, people, the case! Get your minds out of the gutter! =)

It should be apparent to you by now that it wasn't love at first sight. I’m going to attempt to try and redeem myself from those that are currently grinding their teeth at my thoughtless and inattentive words about an actor that I soon realized was not weird, but indeed brilliant. One night I saw the preview for a Law and Order: Criminal Intent episode. I was, of course, turned off to the idea at first since I didn’t like the show, but then…

One of my favorite lines: "That's not good enough, are you crazy?"

At any rate, I saw the preview and was intrigued. I really was for a couple reasons. For one, I myself majored in law and justice and even minored in psychology. Perfect for the show, right? But cop shows have to be pretty damn good to catch my attention. I hate when they’re so illogical that I’d rather pick up my law book and read case law all night then watch this crap. So then what did it for me? Well I love studying different mental diseases; I can’t get enough of them. So this episode was a perfect fit to keep my very picky attention interested. I couldn’t get over the fact that this guy (whom I found out later was Detective Goren) was going on a rogue mission inside a mental institution (which I found out was Tates Corrections). Doesn’t happen every day, maybe a bit illogical, I get it, but still. There was just something about that scenario that had my eyebrows raised and my ears on alert like a dog on the prowl. I’ll never forget my jaw dropping at the events he struggled with throughout the episode. I wasn’t only interested in the mission he seemed to go on against the wishes of all (including his captain and partner, I found out later) but also the relationship involved with him and this Detective Eames character.

Okay, so I've stared at this picture for longer than I'll admit, too.

I was going out to dinner the night it aired so at the last minute I decided to record it before I left. About a week or so later one late night, I decided to take a chance and watch what captured my interest in a 20-something second preview. I figured, why not? The preview looked good enough. Why not take a chance? I could be wrong about this character and actor I knew absolutely nothing about, right?

Well, by the time the episode ended, I was whispering “oh my god, oh my god, oh my god,” and of course desperately wanting more. The only thing that truly bothered me was the fact that it didn’t show Alex busting down the door and rescuing Bobby. I was hoping to catch her comforting him at the hospital. Well that idea was shot to hell! I know, I know. I shouldn’t be so critical of a show I had just become quite fond of. But I really couldn’t help it. Now keep in mind that this was the first episode I dared to entirely watch and yet I was already hooked. Not only had I completely fallen for this ‘really big, tall actor guy,’ but the show as well. The fact that I was a shipper and wanted Bobby and Alex together already was quite telling. Quite frankly, the show had me hook, line and sinker within an hour. I was done for.

I learned later on that this episode was titled “Untethered.” I’m well aware of the fact that many do not like this episode. I, myself, love to talk about it at any chance I can get. Besides, if it wasn’t for this episode, I more than likely wouldn’t be blogging right now (at least not here). I also wouldn’t have challenged myself through the fanfic I wrote, or met the people, the VDO fans I have online because my loyalty to Criminal Intent and Vincent D’Onofrio would be nonexistent.

So, if you ask me if I believe in fate, I will answer you by saying: “Without a doubt.”

The struggle and pain Bobby went through was almost too much to watch; too much for some, but not enough for me. Does that make me weird? What a masochist, right? Possibly, but besides the fact that I loved the pain he suffered and the fact that he was willing to take it to the end of the line…wow! To this day I still can’t figure out how I had missed out on such an amazing, talented actor this long. Why he didn’t win some big, giant award is beyond me. He deserved an Emmy for that performance as well as so many others he’s done.

I’m obviously a fan that came a day late and a dollar short. I can’t believe I waited until the 7th season to love this show! And as much as it saddens me that the show (at least for me) is over, I can’t imagine how it is for you true fans that have been there from day one.

In all, I’ve come to the conclusion that I judged a book by its cover; it can be a fatal mistake at times. I critiqued a show before I even knew what I was critiquing. I failed at being an objective person and because of this; I missed out on a era of a great show. I'm grateful that I was able to correct my skewed beliefs before I missed out entirely. The former Bobby Goren that we all still love was possibly weird in his own way, but also a kind, gentle, wonderful, intelligent man in the end that would go to the end of the line for anyone (including Ross) that he cared for and respected.

What's even more touching to me is how loyal Alex ended up being to Bobby. I hada feeling it would happen this way because there’s no way she would fire him and then continue on working without him.

To have it end the way it did is almost bitter sweet. Once again, it left me wanting more but also being comforted by the fact that we write our own endings. We're able to write our own ending after "Loyalty" Part 2. Whether you're a shipper or just a fan of the show, whichever ending you choose is up to you.

And one thing I can say for sure is that Law and Order: Criminal Intent will be survived by the most important people...its fans.


  1. Hello Snyder! It may have taken you until season 7 to 'find Bobby' and appreciate him, but at least you got there and now your life will never be the same. (No...I'm not kidding) Welcome to the Wonderful World Of Bobby/Vincent Worship.

  2. Hi Snyder, welcome to our clubhouse! I'm happy you're part of Team13, as you can tell, we have tons of fun here. I love your intro, I understand your resistance to the show/VDO because I was in a similar situation during season 3. And one day, it just hit me like a ton of bricks, that that big, tall guy from LOCI was a really good actor AND a sex god!

  3. Welcome to the fold, SNnder. You made the right decision in the end.

  4. Welcome to the fold, SNnder. You made the right decision in the end.

  5. Welcome, Snyder! I'm even later to the fold, not because of resisting Bobby's quirkiness but just out of ignorance. The episode that sealed it for me was "Blind Spot" (about the third episode I watched). I never even saw a non-rerun until the "Loyalty" episodes ran, if you can believe that! But by that time, I had seen and loved them all. It was good reading your story, and I look forward to reading more from you!

  6. Anonymous4:25 PM

    Welcome to our (VDO) world - it'll be an 'adventure' catching up with all you've previously 'missed' ;0)

  7. Welcome Snyder. I just want to say I love your fanfic stories about Bobby and Alex. I thought Loyalty was okay but not enough of Vincent and Kate. But nothing we can do about it. I too am a shipper, although those who aren't are okay with me too . I'll be looking forward to your input here.

  8. Hello and welcome! Glad to have you here, now onto the post. WOW! Gr8 job! The fans of SVU sometimes tend to see LOCI as the red headed stepchild of the series and we all just shake our heads knowing they have missed the point and accept it with a grain of salt. This group of vixens are by far some of the nicest and coolest ppl you'll run into. I can promise you many hours of enjoyment cause this group only seems to post the best pics and deliver the most entertaining ways to spend some quality time with what we fondly call our obsession Mr. D'Onofrio! So get yourself your favorite beverage, (i prefer cool drinks because the man heats me up but have one cause he will make your mouth water a bit!) have a fan at the ready (i must inform you that some computers have overheated with some posts or well person experience telling i find myself a little warm from time to time) and pull up a comfy chair the fun and laughs and sighs are about to begin!

  9. Nice first one, Snyder. As Val said, you made the right decision. Being a VDO fan is a bit like that Eagles song ... You can checkout any time you like, but you can never leave!
    (not that we ever wanted to leave).

    Wonderful comment, Jenz!

  10. Welcome to our world won't regret a second of the time you spend here :-D

  11. Great to see you here Snyder! :)

  12. Thank you everyone for your kind words. Wow, I wasn't expecting to get so many comments. Thank you for the warm welcomeQ I'm sure I'm going to have some fun on here. I mean, isn't VDO one of the best subjects to talk about?! =) Apparently not, because all my friends AND family think I'm nuts. Besides, he's twice my age....and then some. Well, soooo! =) What's your point?

    As far as LOCI goes, I think the problem some people have with the show is they just do not get Vincent D'Onofrio. I mean, he's a guy you either like or don't like in my opinion. It's obviously that I didn't 'get' nor like him until I watched "Untethered" and it hit me like a ton of bricks! Oh, how wrong was I!!!


  13. Welcome Snyder. What a great way to begin. Look forward to reading more of your posts.

  14. A most PERFECT first post, my dear Snyder! Goren grew on me, too ... an "acquired" taste. But it took only about 3 episodes before I had fallen hook, line, and sinker. And once I did, there was NO going back! So glad you're now a part of Team 13!

  15. Anonymous6:23 PM

    Welcome to the world of the D'Onofaholics, Snyder! It was great reading your story. Looking forward to more of your posts.

  16. Thanks again, guys. I have an idea for another post that I'm eagerly, well, trying to work on. I'm still working out the details. I'll try and make it shorter but I won't promise anything. It's just always something I've wanted to write and ask people about because I'm really curious as to YOUR opinions =)


  17. Great post Snyder! I'm so happy to hear more from you here. As you know, I was also late in the VDO fan game, but I'm on board all the way!
    I look forward to more of your posts.