I'm dreaming tonight of a man I love even more than I usually do....

The Christmas season is over and the New Year has begun. I'm surrounded by unopened packages, ribbon, bows, a party hat left over from our New Year's celebration and my old reliable Cosmopolitan Bedside Astrologer 2010 (an optimist’s guide to good sex all year round). According to Cosmo guess what I’m getting all year; no it’s not the winning Lottery ticket; it’s even better. All those who believe that raise their hand. That’s what I thought, no one.

I thoroughly check every package, looked under the tree and up the chimney and much to my surprise I didn't find the gift I asked Santa for? Yes, unbelievably enough the big guy stiffed (if only it were stiff) me again! Even Bobby is surprised! I have got to tell you that big roly poly elf is starting to get on my nerves.

I made a lovely batch of cookies and a few cupcakes just for him and left them by the tree with a nice cup of hot chocolate and a shot of single malt scotch (you know to ward off the cold from that breezy sleigh ride). And what do I get? A plethora of sensible scarves, candles, bottles of wine and sherry, jewelry, journals, clothes and other sundry items.

Seriously, Santa how long can a Vixen hold out before he or she crumbles under the weight of his or her desires? After all we are not made of stone...

Sorry David, I know that's cold.

I mean really, look at him Santa, what's not to love? That charismatic smile, the twinkle in his eye, OMG those eyes, that face, even you have to admit he's got that certain something. And I want it. Is he smirking at me? So Bobby there's not a snowball's chance in hell of my getting my Christmas wish, is that it?

Sigh! You devilish rouge! Okay Santa how about next year you have your little elves make an anatomically correct Vincent (please get the proportions correct!) for all of his Vixens? At least we would have something to make us smile and maybe even make us scream a little or a lot.

So in preparation for next year's gift I'll burn my flannel pajamas purchase a silk nightgown, pour two glasses of scotch instead of my usual hot chocolate and buy a record player and play the vinyl version of Marvin Gaye's "I Want You"; what do you say Santa?

Be an angel....

After all Christmas "comes" only once a year.

Mistletoe 2

Here's to next year and bigger and better things.


  1. Ha, I hear Bobby saying to that statue of David: "Come on, you're a small guy. What size shoe do you wear?"

    Forget elves - only the Vixens are capable to make an anatomically correct Vincent. Hey, who else but us would get the proportions correct?

  2. I don't think Santa and his elves are even capable of pulling off such a fete......*sigh*

  3. Vincent would have to go down as many chimneys as Santa to please all his Vixens.

  4. ... and every year we hope our dreams come true

  5. I feel your pain, Artist. I feel your pain! I guess Santa thought that getting the 4th season LOCI DVDs would be the "next best thing." *sigh*

  6. Well at least one wish came true, I got to meet him at Joe's Pub. I guess Santa thought I was being greedy.

    Still I would love to find him sitting under my tree with a bow on, you can skip the wrapping paper.

  7. Anonymous7:38 PM

    Since Santa 'failed' me - again!! - I'm not speaking to him at the moment.....

  8. Vincent is always in my dreams!

    Lovely post Artist :)

  9. And it's such a simple request. I just don't get that the great Santa Claus can't deliver this particular item. Maybe we'll have better luck with the Easter Bunny.

  10. Good idea Mauigirl, at least with the Easter Bunny (besides being fuzzy & cute) if you don't get Vincent you'll get enough chocolate to make your endorphins sing for a month.